Waiting... Again!

Paid our pile of cash to MIVF this morning. Always a strange feeling, but can now get hubby to collect the medicines this week in preparation for day 2 when it arrives. Dr Foster has me starting at 150iu this cycle. Last cycle we did 250iu and it happened hard and fast and I had a LOT of follies (most of which were empty.. but anyhoo); after the transfer, she said that she would start me slightly lower this cycle, I think she said 200iu then, but I am okay with 150 as well. It may mean longer than a week stimming, but slower will hopefully mean better quality. Of course, me being me, I will worry that perhaps 150 will be TOO low, at least until the first scan.

So, now we wait for a period. I actually feel PMTish but don't know if this one will arrive on its own, pretty rare for me. Usually get the one at the end of a cycle and one after and then loooong cycles again. I'll take some primolut if I need to (you take that drug for 5 days, then when you withdraw from it, you get a period). See how the next few days pan out. I feel sick with excitement and nerves.

IVF Junkie

Hurrah! I commence shooting up tomorrow! Should have been today, but the scan to check progress fell on Cup day so its tomorrow, and scan Wednesday. I talked to her about the very low start dose and told her my IUI history dosage/result and she decided to instead start me at 250. I felt anything less than 200 would be a waste of our time, so was very pleased with that.

So, I collected my second pack now (have one the same from IUI days); of cooler bag, ice brick, pen needle, sharps disposal unit and precious vials and needles. I feel so relieved, honestly. And can you believe my lining was still bloody 4mm?!?! HOW? Stupid period is STILL spotting today. Dr says was definitely right to wait the week given that the period kept going like that, says it would've stuffed things a bit.

I really like my Dr. She listens to me, she's encouraging, realistic and proactive. You really can't ask for more than that when it comes to Assisted Conception, in my opinion.

So, good news. Am already nervous about Wednesdays scan. Am quite certain I will need a lot more beyond that, so its not that. But now I am thinking god if I talked her into a higher dose and I react differently and OVERstim, it will be my fault. Its unlikely... but it will be in my mind til Wednesday. What I expect to happen, is to find some growth, but early days, which will require more stimulation/needles, maybe an increased dose or more of the same. With IUI I injected for 3 weeks and 2 weeks so that is an indication.

Also, I just received an email from the people at www.essentialbaby.com.au which said I had been chosen as a winner for a competition I entered recently. I have won us a copy of this book:

Making Babies: Personal IVF Stories (can click that for more info)

So that will be handy timing, and should inspire and give us strength. Great bonus! Good day!!


ETA: Credit for the term "IVF junkie" which I just love, goes to Adrian B, I have adopted it as my new favourite term.

Hurrah!

Today is a wonderful day! It is the "take last pill today" day! Kaloo kalay! Have I ever been so excited at the prospect of a period? I don't think so! Cannot wait to get off these horrid things. So from now on its just sniffing synarel for a week, scan next Thursday (changed to 10:45am).

Speaking of which, yesterday I paid the difference between a Stim cycle and an ICSI cycle and then called the nurses to sort out picking up the injection because the information book says to organise it in advance to avoid delay. Honestly, so far they're badly lacking in the impressive stakes. We had this conversation:

Me: When do I pick up the meds etc because I have my down reg scan next week.

Nurse: You'll have a script.

Me: I don't have a script, should I have?

Nurse (in a voice that clearly shows she thinks I am lacking brain cells): No you get it from your doctor at your scan.

Me: Oh ok. And erm.. then what do I do with that? Do I take it to a chemist?

Nurse (now sounding like I am from another planet for not knowing the drill): No, you bring it in to us, and we do it all here.

Me: oh ok. And so do I need an appointment for that or?

Nurse (almost shitty now): No, its just routine, you come here after your scan.

Me: Well no one told me that.

Nurse (now feeling chastised and even more pissed as a result): Right, well thats how it works.

Fond farewells etc. (pfft).



So really, not too impressed with them so far to be honest! They've a lot of ground to make up and so far none has been made up at all. Oh well. Long as they get it right on the day...

Oh the characters!

Man, the people we met yesterday at MIVF were such characters. 2 in particular - such odd people!

Poor J had an appointment for his SA yesterday morning so he had to go and do that, and then meet me in the afternoon for the other stuff. Firstly, we met the nurse. She was very nice, showed us the injections which haven't changed since we did IUI - although their trigger is all in one, ready to go; no vial mixing! Woot! I told her I had been on the pill for 3 weeks and was ready to move on so she gave me the script for synarel and said to pick it up then and there, and that she would call me later with my schedule. It was very straight forward, an envelope of info to read and back to the waiting room we went.

We were then called into accounts. We walked in and sat down and the lady said to me"what perfume are you wearing?" I thought to myself oh i must smell nice, how complimentary! I told her and she said "Oh yes, I thought so. I am deathly allergic. I am going to have to get someone else to do this." She called someone else to take over and said she would start, but every 5 seconds she would complain and say she was going to be ill all over me, or "it huts me right here" gently touching a hand to her head. Melodramatic indeed. Was weird. I wasn't sure what to make of it and began to wonder if there were hidden cameras. She started going through the fees and then abruptly stopped and said "no I have to go. I don't want to be throwing up all the way home. is my eye getting smaller?" I was like... err... not really... and Josh pipes up and says "oh yeah it is..." encouraging her neuroses and having fun with it. he is so evil. "I thought so. yes I can feel it" she says and bolts from the room apologising as she goes. I looked at J like.. wtf??? I felt awful!! I am knocking people down with my scent!!!

Anyway, the replacement lady came in and was lovely, talked us through all the fees and so on. Nothing unexpected there except that going public may not be possible. They would try and fit us in, but there is a chance we will end up at Freemasons thereby costing us another 500 bucks. See how we go I guess. We paid then although it wasn't necessary for another couple of weeks, I just wanted it done with so I am committed and don't need to worry about it. Left that with another pile of reading.

Back to the waiting room for another read of Dog Magazine (!) and Vogue Living. Then we got called into the counsellors office. There is no polite way to say this. When we walked in the room STANK. She had obviously just.. well... been struck by flatulence. It was dreadful. I almost gagged and was wondering how the hell I'd be able to sit there for any length of time, all the while hoping it was her and not my husband!!!! Thankfully, it dissipated eventually. teehee! She went through all the background of our ttc and had we told people we were doing IVF and then all the ethical questions. Namely, in the event of immature eggs or ones that are dodgy and won't fertilise, would we donate them to science (not just research, things like teaching new scientists the methods etc) or dispose of them? Then in the event of one of us dying, did we consent to leave any embryos to our partner to use (fine if J dies and I whack them in, but if I die, he needs a new woman to put them in and wouldn't they want their own if he has a new woman? minefield...) And finally, if we are successful and still have embryos in storage, after 5-10 years we need to decide what to do with them; do we dispose, donate to couples, or donate to research. This one we didn't have to decide immediately, we've much time to do that.

She left to photocopy the consent form and J immediately bursts out to me "Did this place STINK when we came in or what?!?!" Boys! We had a giggle and had to recompose before she came back... A further stack of reading and we were done. We were impressed with the staff though, they were friendly and prompt and extremely knowledgeable. i think we both feel in good hands which is important.

After that we picked up the synarel (cha ching.. another $100 bucks!) And came home. Very uneventful. The nurse didn't call either, so I have just left a message this morning and should hear back before 5pm tonight hopefully. Again, I am not desperate to know or particularly antsy. I would like to know so I have the next point to focus on, but otherwise, I am cruisy. For now...

Verdict

That was your hint. How ironic and strange it is, to start assisted conception by taking the pill!!!

Dr. Foster was really good. She asked our history and then asked what we wanted to do, and we of course said IVF please. She said she agreed that was a sensible decision given the mucking about we had already done.

She will only transfer 1. Before going, I thought that with my age and that we knew we CAN conceive, one was best for us anyway, but now shes said it I feel like our chances of it working just halved. I am an odd one.

She asked when my last period was and I said 10 days ago and that I only get them every 80-100 days; so she decided to do a scan on the spot and my lining looked good (she taught me how to read the ultrasound which was great, didn't look like the moon anymore); and then said I could start tomorrow (ie today!).

So, after sorting the $$ - we are away this morning. I took a pill. I told Dad he could have ownership rights over any baby that might be created, especially when it needs a nappy change. :D

Now I have to call the MIVF nurses this morning and tell them I have started. I have NO idea what happens form here. I do know that J has to make an appointment to give a sperm sample but he chickened out of making it yesterday. I was NOT impressed. I have to do most of the hell, he has that one test. Why I oughta... lol.

it is all happening so quickly. Yesterday I was just so overwhelmed and felt like crying and laughing at once. The reality of returning to all the invasive treatment, the finances, the broken dreams seemed to hit a bit. At the same time, I am excited (but to be honest, not overly hopeful). J reminded me that the way to look at it is not that this cycle will work, but that one of three or so will. I like that. I can do that. So here we go!

More stuff

Ballarat is not looking good:

Hi Kelly,
Your initial consult fee do see Dr Bardsley will be $167.00 of which $99.25 will not be claimable from medicare. IVF fees vary depending on whether you have private health insurance. The up front fee will be approx $4,500, you will be eliglble for a medicare rebate the amount being dependant on your medicare safety net. Blood tests will need tobe done through St John of God Pathology and scans through Lake Imaging so I imagine Ballarat will be your closest providers. Hope you can make sense of all this! We can clarify and give you detailed quotes when you see Dr Bardsley.

Bugger. Never mind, if all goes well on Tuesday with MIVF, I will cancel that appointment all together.

Also received this email in reply to another query I had with our PHI -

The item number 13212 is covered under your policy. You have Public Hospital cover with a $400 excess. The item is only covered in a public hospital with the doctor of your own choice.

Which surprised me, although I think our excess will be more than MIVF charge anyway!!

Extra info

I made the appt to see a Dr at MIVF and then realised she was not the Sunshine (closest) clinic Dr. I rang MIVF this morning though, and asked does it have to be that clinics Dr or can I see Dr Foster at her rooms but still do all my bloods and scans at sunshine?

Yes! Dr is irrelevant. Thats good because the Dr at Sunshine is only there Wed arvo and because of small mans school hours, afternoons are not suitable. So I would have had to see him elsewhere at other times anyway.

Also realised that to get to that clinic, its not TOO bad in terms of traffic because I only go as far down the Calder as Sydenham then turn off, and it doesn't get hectic really, until from and after the Sydenham on ramp (as far as I can recall anyway). And if I tried it once and found it was busy, I could always go the back way thereafter, which would be just an extra 10 mins or so. Not so bad after all...

I emailed Ballarat IVF today also, and asked if IVF is required, how do the payment options all work, and I am going to call MIVF accounts later and ask the same. Am hoping one or both, allow you to pay just the gap fee upfront, and bill medicare directly for their share. This would mean the difference between needing to find $3000 (which we can currently do by mid November); and $5000 which would not be possible til Jan/Feb next year.

We will try something before the years end (from Nov) - whether that is IVF or IUI is yet to be seen. Because we already have a child, our safety net for medicare is far lower, at $520 of which we already have $120 toward, and given I am still to see a GP for referrals and have these 2 specialist appointments, we are obviously going to be close to it anyway, so might as well start now. Oh correction, I think we are now on 1029 safety net coz we dont get family tax A anymore, only B. Bugger! Thats 500 less we get back! Oh well. Otherwise, costs are as I imagined, although next weeks appointment just to see the Dr is $170-. Yowsers!